Funny Comments Needed!

[George]

Everyone,

We're working on a few T-Shirts, hats, mousepads, and other items to give away free to people attending various industry related events to help promote the site (gaining even more great members). What we're looking for from you are funny sayings and comments that we can use as taglines to place on the items.

Basic Rules: No Profanity, No Trademark or Coprighted materials.

(For example we plan to use "Can you see me now.." which plays off of the Verizon Wireless tagline "Can you hear me now..". Similar is OK. We'll make the call on whether it crosses the line. Exact copying is a no no.)

We'll take anything. One liners, front and back of the shirt jokes, etc. Anythign that people in our industry would find funny or would mostly likely be the only ones that get it.

And of course, everyone who submits a quote that is chosen will receive a FREE item with their quote on it. For a list of all of the possible items we plan to put your quote on with pictures, CLICK HERE (http://www.cafepress.com/cp/info/products/viewall.aspx)!

Thanks, and good luck!

George

[tjulian]

OK, here's a few (some are corny, but came from working in the Telco office....)

-ISDN = I Still Don't kNow
-Desktop VTC = Anything less than 4 men can move...
-Don't touch that button!
-What's a "VTC?"
-No, you cannot plug this system in in your office....
-Sure, it's secure, as long as YOU don't talk.
-OK, I just bought a VTC, can you come make it work for me?
-Most VTC errors that are not Network related are ID10T (pronounced eye-dee-ten-tee) errors.

more to come, possibly....

[tjulian]

One more I remembered: ISDN: Intermittent Service, Down Now...

[mazzarak]

My personal favourites: for giving to the customer:

"Sorry, if you haven't booked it with us then we won't have launched it yet, no..."

"Ah, see, you've come through to the VIDEOconferencing department, you need to press 1 for audio..."

"if you don't know your ISDN numbers, its going to be a bit tricky to connect you."

"You can't see anything? Can you confirm what channel your monitor is on? ... uh-huh... OK... in that case would you mind switching your monitor on?"

And my favourites that I've heard from customers:

"So how do I turn this thing on then?"

"I could have driven the distance in the time its taken you to connect me!"

"No, sorry, there aren't any remote controls, facilities lock them in a cupboard so we can't break them."

[George]

Originally posted by tjulian@May 12 2004, 12:49 PM

-Sure, it's secure, as long as YOU don't talk.


if you don't know your ISDN numbers, its going to be a bit tricky to connect you."
Looking good, keep em coming!!

How about this....

"Yes I am a VTC engineer, and NO I will not install this at your house..."

[mazzarak]

I had another pearler today actually...


"... oh, you want me to turn it back on again do you?"

:lol:

[Culver]

These are some of the answers I have given or have received on support calls :

"What mute button?"
"I look fuzzy when I move"
"What happens if the ISDN fails?"
"What exactly did Sales tell you?"

or

"If all else fails, blame the Far End."
"Just because they're 300 miles away, doesn't mean you have to shout"
"If it ain't broke, it hasn't been used"
"What makes this better than a WebCam, then?"
"Foolproof it may be, smart-arse proof aint been invented yet"
"Sure....Snapshot is still a really useful feature"

Or the classics :

"Its not a problem, its a feature"
"That will be available in the next software release"

I'll think of more later.

[George]

Hey Good stuff Culver. This idea had sort of died off, but this may just bring it back.

Keep them coming!!

[stungib]

How about....(sung to the tune of Michael Jackson's ABC)

V.T.C, easy as 1.2.3.

[IPjunkie]

"If all else fails, blame the Far End."

a personal favorite of mine!!


OFF TOPIC but related....

Here are some good Video Conference Pranks:

Arrange with everyone in the room to freeze and quit talking all at the same moment.

Look directly into the camera and move your lips as if speaking, but make no noise.

Have someone off-camera talk while someone of the opposite *** lip-syncs on-camera.

**************************************************
here's the only cartoon I could find on the subject....

http://www.office-humour.co.uk/items/media/images/1021.jpg

[tonyi]

Fun thing to say to sales guys

"toggle the o n, o f f, actuator......



(umm thats engineering speak for reboot just in case you didnet get it)